Yes, we all have a purpose that God wants us to fulfill but that purpose will become a shared purpose between you and your spouse. Does that mean if you are called to preach then so should your spouse? Of course not, what it means is if you are called to plant a church then God is going to give your spouse a vision that goes along with yours, maybe they will run one of the ministries within the church.
I know there are tons of people that don’t believe what I just wrote but think about it this way:
Genesis 2:24 - Therefore a man shall leave his father and mother and be joined to his wife, and they shall become one flesh.
Why would God say for the two to become one flesh? I do not believe that God would want two people to become one to then send them off doing two totally different things.
Mark 10:6-9 - But from the beginning of the creation, God made them male and female. For this reason a man shall leave his father and mother and be joined to his wife, and the two shall become one flesh; so then they are no longer two, but one flesh.Therefore what God has joined together, let not man separate.
Again, that verse above goes deeper than what most people think. Now back to the main topic:
Imagine a world where husbands and wives are both working around 50+ hours a week on average and then they both are called to a mission from God that takes another 10-20 hours a week from each other. Now imagine they have kids on top of this so they have to tend to the kids too. When would they have time for their marriage?
They would not have time. The reason I said God’s mission on top of the job is because in most cases your job isn’t the mission. I know there are some exceptions but that isn’t the rule. These are jobs that have to be done and yes you can touch people through the job. I am not saying that at all.
This is why I believe that when God calls people to his mission that if they are married then it will be a shared vision / purpose in some way. Every story we have ever read about where adultery happens, it always started with the couple not spending much time together. They let life get in the way of their marriage.
As Christians we fall into that trap sometimes even more because we lie to ourselves and say well I am pursuing God’s mission for my life. People justify not spending time with their spouse.
How many times have you seen people you thought were very strong Christians who ended up in adultery? Then you ask yourself if they can’t make it then how am I ever going to last in my marriage in the long run? What you are doing is comparing their outer appearance to your inner actions. Appearance isn’t always what it seems.
Anyone you see fall toward adultery, look into how much time they spend together? How much time are they off doing their own things? Am I saying that if you spend all of your time together that you will not fall? NOPE because it is what you put into your marriage that matters.
No matter how much you justify your ministries, your marriage will always be your first ministry. God expects us to nurture and protect our marriages in whatever way we have to. Sometimes you may have to give up your lifestyle in order to protect it. Sometimes you may have to give up friends. Sometimes you may even have to give up your job and find a new one.
Whatever it is that you have to do, ask God to guide you. If you are a little upset with this blog then just maybe it’s God trying to warn you about a few things. What I hope you get out of this is that you start guarding your time and say no to maybe some good things so that you can say yes to the best things that God has to offer with your marriage being first.
Living an Inspired Marriage,